“Perception is reality.”

This is by far one of the most imbecilic clichés/lies that is often said but rarely questioned. It has to be one of the stupidest phrases ever uttered by a human. Perception is inherently not reality.

There is only one reality, no more, no less. Forget String Theory, which says there could be an infinite number of realities, that is just a mathematical construct that, at the time of this writing is just a theory.

For the sake of argument, I will be using myself as an example, but you can substitute yourself with me or the fake plastic plant that Marky Mark talks to in The Happening. Have you seen that movie? Marky Mark talking to a plastic plant like you would talk to a 5-year-old is worth the price of admission. It’s almost as good as the scene in The day After Tomorrow where the main characters run from cold. run from cold like running from someone who wants to beat you up. Brilliant! (Fake Plastic Trees by Radiohead is a great song by the way)

There is only one me, Scott Bewick. I do not change, the reality of who I am never changes. It is constant. Now, hypothetically, assume that the billions and billions of people on this planet have the mental capacity to perceive, sat down with me for a whole day asking me questions, just getting to know me. Now you have one reality, who I am, and billions and billions of different perceptions. each colored and distorted by the other person’s past experiences, culture, biases etc.

If perception is reality, how can there be one reality of me yet billions and billions of perceptions of me?

I’ve heard this ridiculous utterance mostly at work. I had a corporate job in finance. If you work in corporate America you already know this, but employees are frequently reviewed by management to see if a raise, promotion, demotion, whatever is warranted. In the last 5 years I’ve had many many reviews and when my boss is talking about “areas that need improvement” inevitably at the top of the list is sometimes I appear to have a negative attitude. In my younger days, I thought this was an opportunity to open up a philosophical discussion about the nature of human personalities, the differences between how people function in any given environment.

More wrong I could not have been. These meetings were not a forum for discussion. All “they” wantto hear is “Yes, you’re right, there have been instances where I have had a negative attitude and I am doing X, Y and Z to improve.”

But before I figured this out, I would say things like “So, you’re happy with my work and the results, but you think I have a negative attitude? What has given you that impression?” The two most common answers I got were “You don’t smile much.” and “Your body language at the office makes it seem like you don’t want to be here.” In one particular meeting my then boss said “Even now as we are talking you have your legs crossed and are leaning against the backrest of your chair.”

My blood started to boil. Are you fist f*cking me? If you don’t want me to use a back rest, bring in a f*cking bar stool. Legs crossed? What are you looking for, a moron who can’t do the job but won’t cross his legs or dare to even think about using 50% of the chair? I didn’t say this of course. I told him just because I’m not always smiling like a mental patient, I lean back in my chair or god forbid slouch, it doesn’t mean I am unhappy. Going back to my earliest memories, I’ve never been a talker, I reserve smiling for when it is warranted. This is a professional environment. I come in, I do my job, if you have a problem with the results that’s fine. Don’t assume what’s going on in my head because I can tell you right now, it’s wrong. This is who I am, I cannot change my DNA to become a gregarious a**hole at work. If you think I am unhappy, ask me if I am. I’ll tell you the truth.

This is where it comes. The biggest lie so rarely questioned. “Well Scott, perception is reality.” Oh you motherf**ker, that is your perception. How much more arrogant can one get than to presume the way he sees things, distorted by a lifetime of experiences is reality?

Reality as defined by Dictionary.com
a. Something that exists independently of ideas concerning it
b. Something that exists independently of all other things and from which all other things derive.

Perception from Wikipedia
The processes of perception routinely alter what humans see. When people view something with a preconceived idea about it, they tend to take those preconceived ideas and see them whether or not they are there. This problem stems from the fact that humans are unable to understand new information, without the inherent bias of their previous knowledge. A person’s knowledge creates his or her reality as much as the truth, because the human mind can only contemplate that to which it has been exposed.

I left that job and company and with it a ton of money and security. I can’t buy whatever I want anymore, or buy a plane ticket on a whim. I’m chasing something else now and it has nothing to do with corporate culture and performance reviews. There’s no money in it yet, probably never will be. But I can cross my fucking legs and lean back in a chair all I want and not have to explain myself.

-Scott Bewick